Don Lemon is a former CNN anchor who was terminated following allegations of misogynistic behavior toward colleagues. A couple of weekends ago, I was furious when he and others invaded and disrupted a Christian church service in Minnesota. Being the “good Christian” I am, I blew up X with my opinions about Don Lemon and the progressives who sided with his disgusting actions.

I was quite proud of myself for pointing out that he seemed perfectly fine interrupting people worshiping God, yet would have gone bonkers if a Christian group had invaded and disrupted a drag queen reading to school-age children in a public library. I reposted and “liked” every comment that agreed with my position. I felt good about exposing what I saw as hypocrisy and took comfort in believing my position was the righteous one.

That is, until a few days later, when I attended Bible study. Ed, one of the older gentlemen, shared that when he encounters devious people, he reminds himself that Jesus loves them just as much as He loves him. My heart sank. The Holy Spirit was using Ed to convict me. Jesus did not sacrifice Himself only for the Jews, but also for the Gentiles—for everyone in the world: then, now, and in the years to come. Even Mr. Lemon!

“Let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger; for the anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God.” – James 1:19–20

Around the same time, a very close friend, Jenny, found herself caught in a battle between her sister and their stepmom. In a time of extreme emotional stress, the stepmom said something very hurtful to Jenny’s sister. Being a woman who seeks to walk the Christian life, the stepmom apologized profusely within an hour and continued to offer sincere apologies over the next few days.  Although the sister verbally accepted the apology, her heart had not. She repeatedly restated the offense to family and friends, causing a firestorm.

It made me angry because the offending stepmother had done the right thing. I urged Jenny to remind her sister of the line in the Lord’s Prayer: “forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us.” Her sister’s unforgiveness was not only darkening her own doorway, but also the doorways of others who were unaware of the stepmother’s apologies.

“Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you… forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.”– Ephesians 4:31–32

Jenny responded, “It’s beyond my control, and if I say something like that, it won’t be received well and will only make things worse. I’m just going to pray for my sister, asking God to heal her mind and her heart.”

The Holy Spirit used Ed and Jenny to remind me of two essential truths in my walk with Christ.

First, Christ died for everyone. This was a hard truth for the Jews of Jesus’ time to accept. They were God’s “chosen people.” How could Gentiles be given the same footing and access to God? The Holy Spirit was reminding me that Jesus’ work on the cross was for people like Don Lemon too. Jesus loves him the same way He loves me. God does not rank sin by hierarchy—He does not tolerate any of it. That is why Jesus suffered and died on the cross, taking God’s wrath and paying for the sins of the world—your sins, my sins, and even the sins of the worst this world has to offer. 

Second, although the Bible does not teach us to be tolerant, it teaches us to be truthful and prayerful. The truthful part I can do easily, but not always as God intends. Truth without love can be brutal. Jesus was always truthful, but never brutal. You don’t win people by being brutal.

“If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal.” – 1 Corinthians 13:1

If you deliver truth without love, that’s on you. If you deliver truth with love and it is rejected, that’s on them. In God’s economy, it’s not just the truth that matters, but the vehicle used to deliver it — love is that vehicle.

You can’t fix stupid, but God can.

Prayer is powerful. We cannot humanly change a person’s heart—not even our own. The human heart is too powerful for that. But the Creator of the heart can. God, who formed it, has the power to transform it. Instead of throwing darts of anger, we should be throwing darts of prayer.

Prayer changes hearts — Not arguments

The first prayer needs to start with asking God to heal and change our own hearts. Once that happens, we can start launching those prayer darts for God to heal and change other hearts. That’s how powerful God is—He can get a justice-oriented, heterosexual Christian like me to sincerely pray for a gay progressive secular elitist like Don Lemon. Now that is powerful!

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