Families can be prone to drama. Recently, I witnessed an event that was difficult to watch as a loving family was being torn apart by emotions. It involved a 90-year old father and his 4 children all in their 60s. I am not related by blood, I am the outsider. I have a cousin by marriage who uses the term “out-laws,” in lieu of “in-laws.” I favor his term because it reminds those of us not related by blood to mind our own business. In other words, out-laws need to stay on the sidelines and keep your opinions to yourself. Placing your unwanted foot into a family squabble can be as dangerous as a policeman on a domestic disturbance call.
The 90-year old dad attended an oncology appointment due to previous scans revealing tumors in his brain. He was accompanied by the stepmom and his oldest daughter. The 67 year old son who drove over 5-hours to see his father was not invited to the appointment for two very good reasons. First, examining rooms are barely large enough to accommodate the doctor, patient and spouse . The daughter ended up sitting in the physician’s chair while he stood during the consult. There was no room for a 5th person. Secondly, the son is extremely hard of hearing and he does not have hearing aids. It is very difficult to converse with him even at a distance of two feet. The son was extremely hurt, packed his stuff and left before his dad returned from the appointment. One of the other siblings took her brother’s side igniting more emotions and upsetting the 90-year old dad, the patient remind you. Watching this train wreck from the sidelines, I was stunned, then furious, as the two grown siblings let their emotions run wild and their feelings unchecked.
Unfortunately, the other out-law, the stepmom was caught in the middle of the family fray. I was worried for her and sent her a private message saying, “I heard a lot of voices based on feelings the last 24 hours but no voices of reason, and no mention of God in any of the conversations.” My anger turned to sadness as I witnessed good and decent people have several really bad days. The devil had to be smiling from ear to ear over the situation.
Voice of Feelings
Do not let anger lead you to sin; control your emotions to avoid giving the devil a foothold. – Ephesians 4:26-27
Emotions are the raw data, a reaction to the present reality, whereas feelings can be diluted by stories we’ve created in our head based on events of the past or fears of the future—not necessarily the truth of the situation. – Psychology Today
You have probably heard the expression, “it’s ok to have feelings but it’s not ok, to let your feelings have you.” Our emotions are extremely powerful and our feelings can overwhelm rational thought. Unfortunately, most people live by their emotions and feelings, and that is how the devil gets his foot into the door of our lives.
The Voice of Reason
Our human intellect is the source of our voice of reason. We use our rational thoughts to rule over our feelings and emotions.
The voice of reason is essentially the part of you that prioritizes logic, objectivity, and sound judgment over immediate emotional reactions or impulsive desires. It’s the internal compass that guides you toward rational choices, even when faced with challenging circumstances. It’s not about suppressing emotions; it’s about managing them effectively. – Stevia
But what happens when that “internal compass” is not reading true north? How many less than honest and questionable people use their rational intellect to control, mislead, or do harm to others. There is a long list of serial killers with defective compasses who used their rational minds to keep from getting caught. What about the compass of the pharmaceutical president who charges a thousand times more than what it costs to produce a life saving drug? Logical and analytical decision making is extremely imperfect when left to our human intellect, especially when it is based on the darkness of this world.
The Voice of the Holy Spirit
Believers accept Jesus’ work on the cross and are indwelled with the Holy Spirit. If we allow Him, the Holy Spirit provides us spiritual insight and direction through His divine presence and guidance. The Holy Spirit guides us in the truth of God’s will. It’s not a matter of mind over feelings or emotions. It requires you to surrender everything; your mind, your heart, your feelings and your emotions. You submit your entire essence over to the Holy Spirit. You agree to live your life in agreement with God’s will. The Holy Spirit gives us the discernment to know God’s will, and shows us how to live our lives in agreement with Him in our thoughts, purpose, and actions.
How do you know if you are listening to the voice
of the Holy Spirit versus your own?
The Holy Spirit speaks in a very soft voice and it is usually a short sentence or phrase. The Holy Spirit’s advice is always in alignment with biblical teachings. The Holy Spirit fills you with a sense of peace even in the most contentious circumstances.
If you are on the fence about this whole God thing, here is how my journey started. Long story short, I asked the Holy Spirit with a genuine heart to help me. Four months later, I heard His very loving voice on a 45′ sailboat in the middle of the Atlantic Ocean. Give God a chance, turn towards Him and be filled with His light.
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